HUMOR

Two years ago I enlisted my teenage niece to shoot a video of me at a public park. I’m still waiting for it to go viral. With the pandemic raging, what better time than now?

Before we get to the script I want to assure you my videographer was well paid, sort of. We stopped for her favorite ice cream afterwards. A very sensible thing to do when you’ve been outside, underdressed for the chilly winter weather.

The wind cut right through those shiny tights. But when you’re a YouTube star, it’s imperative to put fashion over function. On that note, I’d like to call your attention to my feet. I’m wearing very practical shoes for both snow and exercising — sequined Converse. …

HUMOR

One day perhaps we’ll all look back and laugh about the toilet paper and baking yeast shortages. But not today. This is a day to be grateful for everything we survived in this hella-eventful year.

By chance, I started a subscription with Who Gives a Crap and received my first box of 48 toilet paper rolls just before the shit hit the fan. Had I known just how precious that box of recycled paper would become I might have purchased a truckload. My profits could have rocketed me right into a tax bracket I’ve only dreamed of. …

MINDSET

Is love greater than money or is money one of many expressions of love? If money is currency and currency is energy, money is a way of giving energy to people, causes, and organizations we in turn receive energy from in the form of attention, goods, services, love, and the list goes on. When we pay a massage therapist we are agreeing the energy and love we’ve received during our massage session has value.

Attaching money to the flow of giving and receiving love may seem dirty, gross or inappropriate. Why? We get to decide what it means to us to lift each other up in ways that allow us to thrive and live our best lives. As a human being on planet Earth in most current societies, money is necessary to secure our basic needs and to expand our resources and share our gifts with the world. …

WOMEN

“I was raised by a mother who said to me all the time, ‘Kamala, you may be the first to do many things — make sure you’re not the last.’ “

— Kamala Harris, source

Her mother’s words didn’t fall on deaf ears, they landed in Kamala’s heart and took root in her soul. Our first female vice president has been paving the way for women and BIPOC leaders throughout her life. The more I learn about Kamala Harris the more inspired I feel by her new role in the White House and what it means for women.

The memory of seeing a ballot with a female candidate for president — Hillary Clinton — is vivid in my mind. She was the first female presidential nominee of a major American party. A vision of meaningful change was flickering, beckoning. If a woman could become president what else would be possible? …

POLITICAL HUMOR VOL. 2

Keep your head above water. You’ve always got a safe berth aboard this ship. — Susan Brearley, Captain and EIC

Welcome to our second week of The Political Pulse humor newsletter. You may feel a bit rudderless in the whirlwind of current events 2021 has stirred up so far. Thankfully, MuddyUm writers continue to find humor in the depths of the stormy sea.

If you’ve been hunkering below deck, let the words of our good Captain and Editor-in-Chief, Susan Brearley, nudge you back into the light, “Keep your head above water. You’ve always got a safe berth aboard this ship.”

Without further ado, click the underlined titles to read some of the latest political funnies from the writing crew of the Good Ship MuddyUm. …

HUMOR

Throughout my pregnancy I shared as much as possible on social media — baby bump nudes, live streams of my ultrasound appointments, and details about my bodily functions. I’m collecting copies of everything in a digital file to gift my child on their eighteenth birthday. Tears spring to my eyes just thinking about how special it will be to share those moments.

As my expected delivery date grew nearer I became obsessed with finding a way to culminate my pregnancy journey with an epic social media post. It must have been a divine intervention that led me to the answer. …

HOW-TO-TORIAL

Ten things to check before submitting or publishing

1. The title and subtitle in the draft match the ‘display’ title and subtitle. This can be changed using the … menu beside the publish button. It’s important because your story’s title and subtitle will display according to that input when the story is published and when it’s shared on social media.
2. Title and subtitle do not contain punctuation. There are exceptions, such as question marks.
3. Paragraph length is limited to 3–4 sentences, depending on sentence length. Shorter blocks of text increase readability, especially on phone screens. Break your text up into reasonable chunks.
4. The top three lines are properly formatted as kicker, title, and subtitle. Find out more in these tutorials. Note: this is a MuddyUm pub guideline. …

HOW-TO-TORIAL

Choosing an appealing feature image can drive more traffic to your story and set the mood for readers. There are two tools built into this platform to enable the addition of images — a camera and a magnifying glass.